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A Little More Than Amazing ♥
vickytoria chan ♥.a.k.a nutball/reindeer. .24th april. .sexy seventeen. .taurus. . . . .choir`alto 1.SL.(2007-2008) .plmc. .child of God. . .I'm alittle more than amazing. Loves ♥
my everlastinq.God.my fun-loving.church. my dearest and most treasured.family & friends. my 24/7 with me.handphone. my always rawking.computer. sweet-nice-cold.ice-cream. SOMEthing nutty.nuts. passion.singing. the voices within.choir. the study of books.literature. crazy scribbles.drawing & doodling. funny funny.jokes. a girl's favourite pastime.shopping. out in the sun having fun.volleyball & captain's ball. cuddly love.cow pillow. the HOT one.ZERO. the best to read.manga. fetish for.bananas. playing.pool. Aspirations ♥
to be at least.1.6m tall. more.savings & money. more.clothes. photo.shop. either.ds or psp. travel.around the world. learn.japanese and french. expensive.shopping sprees. my own minature.library. be less bored. Flying Kisses ♥
Talk to me, The ULTIMATE ONE. ♥
Love Them ♥
.aaron..amanda wong.MUNKY. .angelika. .angelyn. .angie. .audrey. .cassandra. .celestia. .chelsea. .cheryl. .cleo.SANTA. .constance. .debbish. .dewaine. .desiree lee. .dwight.WIFE. .elizabeth. .esther. .faith. .fiona. .grace. .hema. .isaac. .jia yu. .jamin. .jane. .janella. .joel.DEVIANTART. .jolene. .jonathan. .joscelyn. .joshua. .joy. .jowell. "AWESOME" .juanita. .jun yang. .karin. .kenneth. .leroy. .marcus. .marieta. .mark. .mavis. .melissa. .m&m warriors. .natalie. .nicole. .olivia.FURBALL. .poh hun. .rachel. .randi. .randy. .ray. .sac voices. .sara. .shu min. .teresa. .teri. .tracy. .vanessa. .veronica. .yeung wing.SEXY MASTER. Archives ♥
February 2006March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 Recent
You Raise Me Up - Josh GrobanWhen I am down and, o... SHAKESPEARE IN LOVEWhen most I wink, then do mine ... FALLEN.This string of endless gossips,Alive is a d... SAME SIDE OF THE MOON - Corrine MayI'm looking out... CHILDREN.Hide and seek is a game we play,Oh please... SPOONFUL OF SUGAR.A fizzling candy, sugar-coatedPo... Thanks.If you ever need me,I'll always be here for... YOU AND ME.We smile, we chat.The words spoken seem... I mean it more than ever when I say, "I love you."... HAPPY SEXY SEVENTEENTH BIRTHDAY TO ME! (:And happy... Credits ♥
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//Monday, December 29, 2008 1:42 PM
 NIGHTMARES. Close and near, In throngs like an army's fleet, They gallop full speed charging. Wild and shrill, Their cries pierce the night, Uncontrollable screaming. Strong and forceful, As they arrive unexpectedly, Peace is breaking. Helpless and lost, They continue to chase, A race never ending. Scary and brutal, Deadly hooves of their stampede, Their chaos heavily pounding. Despite the terror, there is a gift Specially for the rider of the mare, The dreamer of the dream - Only for one and no other, an echoing voice haunting.
//Friday, December 26, 2008 12:50 PM
MEMORIES OF TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD.
"It was times like these when I thought my father, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest man who ever lived." "The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience." "I wanted you to see what real courage is, instead of getting the idea that courage is a man with a gun in his hand. It's when you know you're licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see it through no matter what. You rarely win, but sometimes you do." "Atticus told me to delete the adjectives and I'd have the facts." "Children are children, but they can spot an evasion quicker than adults, and evasion simply muddles 'em." "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view... until you climb into his skin and walk around in it." Mockingbirds don't do one thing but make music for us to enjoy... but sing their hearts out for us. That's why it's a sin to kill a mockingbird." "I think there's just one kind of folks. Folks." "A court is only as sound as its jury, and a jury is only as sound as the men who make it up." I thank the author who wrote this book as I believe that her written words are not only a part of a little girl's story but also a part of life to be an eye opener for the many who have a blind soul. A book written to inspire many and also for many to be inspired in return.
//Thursday, December 25, 2008 11:30 PM
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS!
I LOVE YOU MY SAVIOR, REDEEMER AND KING! & I enjoyed talking to you while I was eating alone for dinner tonight. Thank you for coming into this world because of your great love for me. Your precious love, Victoria. (: MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!
//Saturday, December 20, 2008 6:05 PM
 HE CAME KNOCKING ON MY HEART. The bitterness disappears and in he comes. A man of strength, a man of might opens the door. "Daddy!" his daughter welcomes him with glee, full of cheer. He towers over the tiny child, gently holding her in his warm arms and never wanting to let her go. A sense of love, a life starting anew. For the first time, she hears his soft whisper, "I love you." Years passed and like all children, the little girl grows older. Like all children, she forgets a Father's love. Overly caught up in her troubles and life, she runs from home. Too hurt to turn back, too hurt to realise where to go. Lost like a lamb wandering in wilderness, she ventures too far. A lost child, vulnerable with hidden scars. He worries and watches her stumble, ensuring that she would always be able to pick herself up. Watching her cry in the night when no one is looking. Loving her with all his might. After seeing her pain, his heart softens and weeps. The father walks up to the frightened child and calls her to him, arms open wide. At the sound of his footsteps on the green pastures, she turns back to find her father waiting. "Come here, love. Come." he calmly urges her. She runs and lowers herself before him. Her face stained by the tears of her pain, "I'm sorry, Daddy. I'm sorry." He holds and tells her the exact words she seeks to hear "My dear child, I love you and always will. Let me fill your heart with love and lift you from the worries and burdens that haunt you. Take my hand and let me guide you home. Now love, will you open your heart to me?" She bows her head and nods. Once again, love and peace flooded her heart. The storm is calm, the waves no longer raging. As the the sun rises and a new day is born, the father and his daughter walk home together, hand in hand. Suddenly, the little girl stops in the midst of their walk and looks up at her father, giving him a gentle squeeze. "I love you too, Daddy." Thank you Father for knocking on my heart and for giving me the loved ones to remember a love which satisfies the human heart. Thank you for being my everything. Thank you for allowing me to love you. Thank you for filling my heart with your love. Thank you for this gift of life.
//Friday, December 12, 2008 11:03 PM
SOMETHING TO PONDER ABOUT.
hello again. this is awfully random but I felt like typing something. and this came to mind: If a picture can paint a thousand words. Then a thousand words can also paint a picture. Right? (:
// 8:22 PM
HELLO PEOPLE! (:
here to inform you that there will be no blog posts from 13th to the 16th of December! WOOHOO! I'll be off at THE REAL CAMP "roughing it out"! :P HAVE FUN Y'ALL! (: SEE YA! GO GERMANY! GO GUTENTAG! GO RED CLAN! GO HITLER UMBRELLA! (: p.s. The song "Paper Chase" in my music player is cool. BIG THANKS TO JOWELL (the awesome one) FOR THE SONG. And feel free to spam my tagboard. Love!
//Wednesday, December 10, 2008 5:57 PM
 TRAPPED IN THIS CRAZY WORLD. Okay people, finally blogging as me for now. Not as some she, they, "I", you, we or he? Haven't been getting along with life easily at the moment. I think I'm a tad bit paranoid. Who am I kidding, I'm paranoid to the rating of 10/10. Gosh. There's so many things to get concerned about CURRENTLY, I suppose? Well, here goes the list. 1. O Level Results. Let's see. I'm having doubts in getting at least 13 points for admission into polytechnic. (Been praying ultra hard daily for 13 points maximum.) Okay so lets say things don't turn out the way I want them to. If I apply for design... Oh boy, I've got no idea what I'm getting myself into. Portfolio need to be prepared plus interview. This is not good for me cause doing portfolios would clash with my lazy personality. Okay, so it isn't a good excuse but if I'm lazy, I'm lazy. What more can anyone say? Even though I do enjoy art but I enjoy it at my own pace. Oh wells guess I have to "suffer" a little more if that does happen, right? 2. Family. Alright before you get any weird ideas on me having family issues... Please pause your little mind theatre. Basically, I am not as close as most people think I am with family. Not that I want to distant myself away from my parents and fellow brother but like most teenagers, clicking with parents is not exactly ideal. As for my brother, he's autistic. So I can't exactly turn to him cause he wouldn't be able to relate to me as how most siblings do with each other which can be awfully lonely. He doesn't annoy me, I don't annoy him. We are in separate "peaceful" worlds. Our worlds might be chaotic and gloomy but he wouldn't realise that his is unless Coke disappeared from the face of the Earth. If that day comes, I'm sure you'll remember that I have a brother. He will be the boy/guy who will cry and wail for Coke till the entire whole knows about it and that's my brother for you. At the end of the day, I still ask myself: What can I do without them? 3. Relatives. This group of peeps are usually my weekend companions (not all of them are). I'm not talking about my cousins only. Aunts and uncles included of course. We are connected by blood only/and by church I suppose? However, at present it seems that water is as thick as blood or maybe thicker. They change, we change and everyone changes. There are times where emotions may get really nasty or there's some strain due to having hardly anything in common. Of course spiteful words that cuts the soul like a sharpened blade. Then again, they're family as well. The only question is... when they turn into strangers from loved ones, can they turn themselves back? 4. Love life? Okay, this would be a sensitive and highly personal topic to touch but apparently it is on my list of concerns. Frankly speaking, this issue is a complete mystery to me. There are times I feel that I've moved on and there are times that I feel that I haven't. There are times that I make both a foolish and wise decisions and there are times I don't. So where exactly am I? Which time am I living in? Obviously, the present. The present = stuck. So therefore, I'm assured that it's pointless to care about this area in my life ever again and leave it to be a mystery that no one (even myself) can solve. This realistically concludes that I have no intention of marrying and might turn to adoption instead. Then again, is this what I'll say ten years down the road? 5. Church. Well this is part of my social life so I suppose that it affects me as well. Both spiritually and emotionally of course. Spiritual walk with THE BIG ONE is fine for now. So I guess it boils down to the people. Let's see what I can say. I'm grateful for many who believe in me more than most people would and to see me as a great companion and friend and who would do the same for me. However, I think there are many of us who ought to follow what we listen to and what we tell others (including myself at times). To not judge by the outer or be prejudice to those who may be a misfit is what I would advice. Don't be impressed by popularity but personality. Yet, do I actually follow these rules myself? 6. Future. There's so many things to think about for the future till the list is never ending. Financial issues. Important aspirations and goals to achieve. The person who I'll grow up to be. The stress. The new people. Studies. Abilities and talents. Competition for jobs. Bills and payments. Responsibilities. The ugliness of human nature. Where do I go from here, from the present? Which piece to play on the chess board? Which move to make? Which choice? 7. Past. Happy memories, disappointing memories. Smiles and frowns. The mistakes. The innocence. The path that I've walked but have not completed. Turning back, I've grown much. If so, why do I want to turn back time when what is done is done? Then I continue to ask myself: "But is what is done is done ever enough?" 8. Myself. To think about the people in my life and to think of myself about thinking about them and me is rather unsettling. Unlike most teenagers, I seem to ponder about these topics much more than they do. I'm starting to think that I'm not normal by doing so. Is it me or is it them? Teenagers don't seem to express themselves in this manner. Most would probably blog about a cool song or a day at school with friends or their emotions with plenty of vulgarities etc. I used to be like that but now I've stopped I suppose? Why? What changed my concerns in life? Why do I care more about the way I live more than clothes or music? Why do I seem so different? Why me?
//Saturday, December 06, 2008 5:07 PM
 IN THE SILENCE. Speak. Go on, speak. Open and shut, a breath released. Just right ahead, within full grasp. Zero excitement, one does not reply. Listen to the callings, echoes of the mind. Gently pushing, retreating further. Time ticks slowly, softly rocking back and forth. Memories drip lightly, an unforgettable impact. Against the mirror, an uncorrectable mistake. No sound made, the message told in one gesture. Loudly spoken, only in the silence.
//Thursday, December 04, 2008 9:19 PM
 UNDERSTANDING IS AN UNDERSTATEMENT, NOT. Tangled in issues? Problems? Screwed up situations? Trials? Obstacles? Disputes? Troubles? Dilemmas? Predicaments? A very messy life? Sure, don't we all have those? "Nobody understands me." "I know they mean well but they just don't get what I'm trying to say." Sounds familiar, much? Everyday we all seek to be understood by the people around us. We all want the empathy of others. Yet, there are times that many of us are unable to execute that for others as well. For example, when your parents go "Blah blah blah", there is a chance of you going "Oh gosh, the aliens are speaking idiot to me again." or "Nag, nag, nag. That's all they'll ever do." At the same time, you know they mean well, however, it is a child's nature to shut them out and be ungrateful. Then you start being cynical all over again with the line: "Nobody cares. Nobody understands." Regardless what they say, your parents words are labelled: IMBECILIC. Alright so if parents don't understand you, who does then? You turn to your friends and perhaps relatives for some cases. Confiding in them day after day, pouring out all that is bottled up. Sure, your friends listen and tell you they understand so that you'll feel better while you cry your lungs out and drown in your tears. Once you spill everything out, you really start wondering if they understand you. You start wondering how much can these people who lead a extremely different life from yours can really understand. Would your problems and sorrow really mean much to them? Loved ones standing by you for the rest of your lifetime? After all, the truth is that people come and go, no one stays in the same place for long. What if both parents, loved ones and friends don't satisfy your need for a greater amount of understanding? Let's say you are religious and you decide to turn to God as the final solution. So you and pray and pray and keep praying. You tell your God about what's troubling you everyday. You get it off your chest and you feel better. However, that feeling never sustains or assures the human heart easily. Eventually, there comes a question of faith and rationality: "How much can I rely on God?". At the end of the day, you realise that you're not fully understood either. Now, what? You're left on your own, alone, stuck. Everything unsolved. You turn grumpy and unpleasant. You don't understand your friends or family. They try to be kind and sensitive no matter how much you hurt them but you have your blind spots and take them for granted. You take full advantage of them without being sensitive: "I don't care about what you are telling me, I've got better things to worry or care about.". You don't show any empathy towards them or the events that goes on with their lives. You turn into an extremely self-centered monster. All you ever care about is that no one "understands" you. Back to square one, you're all alone. Don't worry. You're not the only one of such species. The truth is that there are indeed many in this world who lack the empathy as well. You're not as alone as you think you are. You'll probably refute: "No way, I'll never be such a heartless person.". Well, think again, do you really think so? To me, I think the answer to such a person's character is to understand and empathise with themself. To me, I feel that no matter how numerous the amount of people who belittles one, there's always a chance of being understood. Regardless of how sincere or hypocritical a loved one can be and as long as one is able to show empathy is all that matters despite being kindly treated or ill treated by others. At the end of the day, I think the one emotion that proves us to be humans is emapthy instead of love. Love is the emotion that lives in all living things but the one emotion that sets us apart as God's greatest creation is empathy. Empathy is the intellectual identification with or vicarious experiencing of the feelings, thoughts, or attitudes of another. In my opinion, to be able to empathise is a very special gift that God could ever give to his greatest creation. And maybe instead of only wanting others to care about you, perhaps its time that you use your empathy as a gift to others as well. After all, isn't Christmas just round the corner? So start asking yourself: "How far will I go for others?" “You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view — until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.” --quoted after Atticus
//Wednesday, December 03, 2008 3:47 PM
  HEARTSTRINGS. Marionettes, puppets without a heart that beats. Nothing moves them, the air undisturbed. Like sheep they follow those who take the lead. Hanging down thin thread, lifeless and delicate. Still dolls that takes a liking to figures in reality, Held and bounded by tangled ropes, suffocating. Tug and tug, they would move as ordered. Yet like marionettes, they are left without a soul. As the golden spotlight shines through, We watch life unfold itself, alive and moving. For a split second or perhaps an illusion, Beating - their heartstrings were pulled. |
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