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A Little More Than Amazing ♥
vickytoria chan ♥.a.k.a nutball/reindeer. .24th april. .sexy seventeen. .taurus. . . . .choir`alto 1.SL.(2007-2008) .plmc. .child of God. . .I'm alittle more than amazing. Loves ♥
my everlastinq.God.my fun-loving.church. my dearest and most treasured.family & friends. my 24/7 with me.handphone. my always rawking.computer. sweet-nice-cold.ice-cream. SOMEthing nutty.nuts. passion.singing. the voices within.choir. the study of books.literature. crazy scribbles.drawing & doodling. funny funny.jokes. a girl's favourite pastime.shopping. out in the sun having fun.volleyball & captain's ball. cuddly love.cow pillow. the HOT one.ZERO. the best to read.manga. fetish for.bananas. playing.pool. Aspirations ♥
to be at least.1.6m tall. more.savings & money. more.clothes. photo.shop. either.ds or psp. travel.around the world. learn.japanese and french. expensive.shopping sprees. my own minature.library. be less bored. Flying Kisses ♥
Talk to me, The ULTIMATE ONE. ♥
Love Them ♥
.aaron..amanda wong.MUNKY. .angelika. .angelyn. .angie. .audrey. .cassandra. .celestia. .chelsea. .cheryl. .cleo.SANTA. .constance. .debbish. .dewaine. .desiree lee. .dwight.WIFE. .elizabeth. .esther. .faith. .fiona. .grace. .hema. .isaac. .jia yu. .jamin. .jane. .janella. .joel.DEVIANTART. .jolene. .jonathan. .joscelyn. .joshua. .joy. .jowell. "AWESOME" .juanita. .jun yang. .karin. .kenneth. .leroy. .marcus. .marieta. .mark. .mavis. .melissa. .m&m warriors. .natalie. .nicole. .olivia.FURBALL. .poh hun. .rachel. .randi. .randy. .ray. .sac voices. .sara. .shu min. .teresa. .teri. .tracy. .vanessa. .veronica. .yeung wing.SEXY MASTER. Archives ♥
February 2006March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 Recent
You Raise Me Up - Josh GrobanWhen I am down and, o... SHAKESPEARE IN LOVEWhen most I wink, then do mine ... FALLEN.This string of endless gossips,Alive is a d... SAME SIDE OF THE MOON - Corrine MayI'm looking out... CHILDREN.Hide and seek is a game we play,Oh please... SPOONFUL OF SUGAR.A fizzling candy, sugar-coatedPo... Thanks.If you ever need me,I'll always be here for... YOU AND ME.We smile, we chat.The words spoken seem... I mean it more than ever when I say, "I love you."... HAPPY SEXY SEVENTEENTH BIRTHDAY TO ME! (:And happy... Credits ♥
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//Saturday, May 31, 2008 8:09 AM
gah.
just got scolded by my dad for no particular reason. seriously i dont get it. it doesn't mean that if someone doesn't do their homework till the very last minute means that they are lazy and it's bad habit by cummulating all their piles of work together. but what happens when that is the only piece of homework you've got. SO IT CAN'T BE ANY MORE POSSIBLE WAYS TO CUMMULATE THE WORK TOGETHER UNLESS YOU GET MORE WORK. and the lazy part. WHO WAS THE ONE WHO FORCED ME OUT OF THE HOUSE YESTERDAY? if i had stayed home in the afternoon, i would have studied my history first then do my science work. instead i ended returning home in the evening. which resulted me to study my history only. OKAY FINE I ADMIT THAT I WAS PLAYING MY COMPUTER GAME AFTER STUDYING. it was a friday night! but at least i took responsibility to wake up early today and reduce my beauty sleep to do the freaking work. and who said that i wanted to go out for breakfast. if you want that IT DOESN'T MEAN THAT I DO. bear in that traditional brain of yours THAT I AM DIFFERENT FROM YOU. and thanks for ruining my glorious weekend morning.
//Friday, May 30, 2008 5:20 PM
a thought came through my head awhile ago.
and now it has to get out. becuase what i thought of gave me major goosebumps. DEAR GOD, I PRAY THAT IT WILL NEVER HAPPEN EVER AGAIN OR EVER COME TRUE. AMEN. i really need a distraction. please. any distraction.
//Thursday, May 29, 2008 4:23 PM
-to remain as a mystery in one's eyes & let bygones be silenced.
caution: knowing me too well might bore you. (:
//Wednesday, May 28, 2008 7:11 PM
1.How tall are you? IT'S A SENSITIVE ISSUE. hahaha. 157 or 158cm actually. YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT.
2. Have you ever been unfaithful in a relationship? uh. OF COURSE NOT. 3. Do you own a gun? No. If i do, i'll let you know again. 4. If you had a mental disorder, what would it be? probably my brain would be filled with laughing gas? i dont think there is such a disorder anyway. 5. How many letters are in your crush's name? um. don't have a crush? but since 5 is my favourite number i shall like pretend i do have one. 6. What do you think of hot dogs? they are HOT. LIKE ME. 7. What's your favorite Christmas song? All I Want For Christmas Is You. 8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? I DRINK CHOCOLATE MILK EVERY MORNING. YUM YUM. 9. Do you do push-ups? hahahahaha. NO WAY. 10. Have you ever done ecstasy? never even gotten close to it. have you? 11. Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend? currently SINGLE. if i say that i'm available, my parents would kill me. 12. Do you like the rain? i'm more of a sunshine person. i like clear blue skies compared to grey stormy clouds & ITS THUNDER. >.<> 13.Do you own a knife? I OWN MANY KNIVES. and biggest one looks good on you. once i've stabbed you. 14. What do you smell like? i don't like sniffing my pits, if you know what i mean. i take regular baths. SO I SMELL LIKE MY LAVENDER DOVE BODY SOAP DUH! 15. Do you have A.D.D.? me :Do you have M.I.N.U.S? 16. Full initials? VCJL. 17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment: SHUCHKS. I CAN'T SAY IT. I WON'T SAY IT. :P 18. Name the last 3 things you have bought today? tom yam noodle and soya bean milk. didnt's buy anything more than that. I KNOW HOW TO SAVE MONEY KAY. 19. Name five drinks you regularly drink, in order most to least. alkaline water. chocolate milk. sprite. iced milo. iced lemon tea. 20. What time did you wake up today? 6.30am 21. Can you spell? sure i can. but i'm a terrible typer. 22. Current worry? how to reduce the number 26 to 9. 23. Favorite place to be? ANYWHERE BUT HOME AND SCHOOL. SCHOOL IS THE WORST. so please date me. 24. Least favorite place to be? SCHOOL. 25. Where would you like to go? Japan. LOVE THAT PLACE. 26. Do you own slippers? YES i'm a size 5 by the way. 27. What do you think you'll be? an insurance seller who can milk cows? PROBABLY NOT. 28. Do you burn or tan? tan with a tinge of red when under the sun. 29.Yellow or blue? i like both? IN FACT I LIKE MORE THAN THOSE 2 COLOURS. 30. Would you be a pirate? NO. i might like adventure, but not too much of it. 31.Last time your cell rang? on sunday. it was an invite to a birthday party. 32. What songs do you sing in the shower? whatever song i wanna sing. I SING EVERYWHERE. 33. What did you fear was going to get you at night as a child? ILLUSIONS OF GHOSTS BESIDE MY BED. 34. What's in your pockets right now? my phone. 35. Last thing that made you laugh? PARTICULAR MSN CONVERSATIONS. 36. Best bed sheets you had as a child? dark blue base with yellow stars and red flowers??? 37. Worst injury you've ever had? an aching tail bone & a knee cap which got hurt twice repeatedly. 38. What is your GPA? probably really LOW. NOT A GENIUS YOU KNOW. 39. How many TVs do you have in your house? 3. HARDLY USE ANY OF THEM. 40. Who is your loudest friend? actually no one has been more louder than me. FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVENT HEARD MY FULL VOCAL VOLUME, GOOD FOR YOU. 41. Who is your most silent friend? Edrea. my sec 3 junior. IS VERY QUIET. 42. Does someone have a crush on you? if i assume, there might be. if i dont assume, then its more of a NO. 43. Do you wish on stars? NO, I WOULD NEVER. I JUST LIKE STARING AT THEM. 44. What is your favourite book? vampire knight! (it's a manga) 45. What song did you last hear? Dream Big - David Cook. 46. What were you doing at 12 an last night? TAKING MY BEAUTY SLEEP. IT'S ESSENTIAL. 47. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up? why?! WHY?! (shuts the alarm clock up.) 48. Does anyone know your password to your email? haha DEFINATELY NO ONE. 49. What was the last thing you ordered at McDonalds? um too long ago to remember. I DONT SNACK AT MACS. 50. Are you an emotional person? rather. depending on my situations. 51. Do you like your school? THE PEOPLE. YES. THE BUILDING. NO 52. Do you believe in love at first sight? so far no one has captured me with their looks. 53. Ever felt jealous of your friend? NO. I LOVE ME & FRIEND. BUT ME MORE. 54. What was the last thing you did? if it includes what i'm currently doing, then it's blogging. if not, then it's having dinner. 55. Who is right next to you? THE FLOOR. HI FLOOR! (: 56. Who was the last person you ate with? my parents. 57. What song are you listening to right now? Marie Didgy-Where Do I Go. 58. How's the weather right now? SLIGHTLY COOLING (it's night time) 59. Last person who called you today? if you literally mean calling my name. MY FORM TEACHER. 60. Last song you sang? can't remember, sung too many. 61. Last time you danced? probably in sec 3. BUT I WON'T CALL IT DANCING. 62. Lost a friendship over something stupid? don't thing so. NOT MY LOSS ANYWAY. 63. Last thing you ate? rice, spinach, prawn, nuggets, cheese cake, egg tart, fish. 64. Been really depressed before? YES. ONCE. 65. Faked being sick to miss school? if there was some parental allowance in this house, i would have tried to do so by now. 66. Current taste? Slimey. like saliva. 67. Who is the person that posted this survey? Joscelyn & Leeroy. 68. What are you wearing right now? white "love to love giodarno" shirt & a pair of pale gree mcblue shorts. (do i have to tell you my underwear as well?) 69. Are you too shy to ask anyone out? NOT REALLY. i'm not as shy as i look. but i'd rather someone asked me out. 70. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex? their personality. looks dont bother to me. 71. Where are you right now? AT HOME. 72. What date and day is it? Wednesday, 28th May 2008. 73. Did you go anywhere today? SCHOOL. pasir ris for tuition. 74. What did you do there? chapter on integration. 75. How old are you? SWEET 16. 76. Are you mature or immature? if i said that i am both. MAJORITY WOULDN'T BELIEVE. 77. Do you call your parents by their first name? no. that's so awkward. 78. Are you an only child? i've got a younger bro. he's autistic. LOVE HIM. (: 79. Where do you go shopping? EXPO when there is a sale. 80. Do you like where you work? i haven't even started. but if you mean homeworking. its either SCHOOL or HOME. so of course, it's a NO. 81. Do you like books? i like all kinds. mystery, romance, bimbotic, fiction, science fiction with fantasy is okay, manga, comics and not so much of those horror one though. 82. Do you want to get married? sure, i dont mind. 83. To whom? someone who just enjoy being around me, and loves me (DUH), a simple and decent gentleman. (: i really dont ask for much. must be a christian. i'm not trying to be religiously prejudice. sorry if you think i am.
// 1:52 PM
hello all you people.
hahaha. gonna like let you know my june holiday schedule. so that you can like book when you wanna hang out with me. from 26th may - 30th june. SCHOOL. but you can like just have a simple meal with me on a weekday when i'm done after school. 31st - 1st june. on sat morning i've got science tuition till 11. in the evening i've got to be at some friend's of my parents house warming. on sunday. CHURCH. so technically. not free on this weekend. 2nd june - 6th june. LOL. i will be in school in the morning till 12.30, i think, on monday, tuesday and thursday? not very sure. but definately not free in the morning. available in the afternoon though. wednesday i've got math tuition in the morning. aunty joyce my tutor should be slotting me in the morning. CAUSE I'M ALWAYS ABLE TO WAKE UP EARLY. AND I DON'T SLEEP THAT MUCH. so yes. friday, will be in school at a literature workshop for almost the whole day, till late afternoon. NOT IDEAL TO DATE ME ON FRIDAY. 7th june - 8th june. usual science tuition till 11 on saturday. i think father's day is on saturday. NOT SURE. if it is, wont be free. on sunday. CHURCH. 9th june - 13th june on tuesday & wednesday mornings i should have my math tuition in the morning which would probably end by 11. on thursday i will be in school till 12.30, i think? afternoons i am available. on the rest of the days, i'll be free the whole day. 14th june - 15th june. saturday science tuition till 11. after that, so far there isnt any plans. so i'm free. (: sunday. CHURCH. 16th june - 20th june. SCHOOL AGAIN. afternoons are available after school. I'M FREE ON THE 20TH THOUGH! (: HAHAHA! VERY AVAILABLE. 22nd june - 23rd june. saturday science tuition till 11. no plans in the afternoon so far. that means i'm free. (: sunday. CHURCH. *if you want to chill and hang out at night. you will need to clarify with me. becuase my parents will demand the full details. but it SHOULD be alright. (: okay hope the schedule will help. BE SURE TO MAKE A DATE WITH ME. :P
//Tuesday, May 27, 2008 4:50 PM
gosh.
what in the world are you doing to yourself, victoria? here you are trying to avoid repeating the past. but you do things that actually makes you succumb to it instead. ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL YOURSELF? how sucidal, really. are you ever ready to repeat it all? and have a 50-50 chance of perhaps being able to change things this time? big risks to take, little hope to believe in. -to take comfort in lies, is very much a sin to prevent. THE ILLUSIONS. here i am standing, with no immunity to the shattering of glass. cut & scared i will be when broken. high hopes, falling deeper. embraced fully in it's fragility & delicate beauty, displayed by the stunning light. if all is well & truths are revealed. safe i will be. tumbling, tumbling, tumbling, down into a sparkling deceiving web. temptations call me. amazing as it may seem, leaving one trapped & tangled. to be constantly spun in this huge dilemna, and be blinded in lies & it's providing sanctuary. is where i shall not be.
//Monday, May 26, 2008 2:35 PM
CHINESE O LEVELS WERE EASIER THAN WHAT I'VE EXPECTED.
seriously. the written papers took me by surprise. i was like thinking in my mind when i got out of the exam hall. WAS THAT EVEN CHINESE?!?!?!? (you can practically guess my reaction when i opened the question booklet.)
//Sunday, May 25, 2008 4:08 PM
been feeling uneasy the whole day.
i've got no idea why. came down with the flu yesterday. but i'm alright now. the strangest part is that i feel awkward. as if something's amiss. and i terribly don't know the reason. maybe i'm just lying to myself. hah. maybe that's just the reason why. i musn't allow the past to catch up with me. to only think with my head and not my heart. is the trigger i've got to pull. just stay that way. and i'll be alright. yea, i'll be alright. how foolish can i get? EXTREMELY.
//Thursday, May 22, 2008 10:24 PM
I'M GETTING PHATTTT ( FAT)!!!
SHALL DO SIT UPS EVERY NIGHT! RESULTS DAY (tomorrow) = DOOMS DAY (:
//Tuesday, May 20, 2008 3:44 PM
//Friday, May 16, 2008 5:21 PM
hello you people.
TO MY DARLING ALTO ONES / EX-ALTO ONES! I'M PROUD OF YOU TO BE DEDICATED TO ALTO ONES. THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING THE SECTION. (: LOVE YOU ALL, FOR BEING YOU. hahahahaha. hmmm. recently, i've heard some choir news. REALLY BEING UPDATED WITH CHOIR. lol. received smses on changing of sections. and so it seems that the ALTO ONES OF 2007 - 2008 (Mid-May) have been splitted up. well, well, well, it seems that all you peoples' vocal chords are changing. LOL. received many complaints about the splitting up. and there's nothing i can do about it. but the one important thing that must always be in your mind would be that you give your best and always do your best whichever part you sing. DO IT FOR YOURSELF. i would rather you all build up the enjoyment and satisfaction of performing as an individual. try to open up as well. to the new and the old things. you may grief, but don't self pity. i understand friends are very important. especially the memories that we shared together. but all in all, we need to grow as an individual. for some of you it is just the start. for others it is your final lap. whatever it is. bare the one thing in mind as you move together. in different areas, but as a big picture. WOULD YOU REGRET WHEN IT'S TIME TO LEAVE? i'll leave that up to you to think about. all i can say would be, think with your head and not your heart. with every action, comes its consequence. remember it's a given gift to be able to sing. no matter where you are. it is still a given gift. (:
//Tuesday, May 13, 2008 1:54 PM
 starting with nonsensical jokes. starting with many tickles and pokes. starting with insane pillow fights. starting with the endless party nights. starting with spending time together. starting with being friends forever. it's all worth it. even if it means going a thousand miles. in return for a thousand smiles. (:
//Sunday, May 11, 2008 4:46 PM
hello people.
finally exams are over. apologies for like being late for declaring that my exams are over??? LOL. anyway... let me give a brief conclusion of this week of exams. on monday i sat for my history paper. pracitcally DIED. but it wasn't as bad as social studies. social studies is probably the subject i'm worst at! (if you don't include chinese that is. :P) anyway, back to my brief conclusion. next day was literature paper 2 and chemistry (science). if the literature examiner who marks that paper is merciful... I MIGHT PASS??? LOL. chem was alright though. but there were some stuff that i've learnt before and have forgotten during the exam. so yes. MAY BE DOOM FOR THAT. but i think i'll live. (: hmm that was all for tuesday. as for wednesday, physics (science) and a.math paper 1. PHYSICS ROCKED! LOL. it was easy. but then again, there were some stuff i've also learnt before and have forgotten. BUT I KNOW THAT I WILL DO WAY BETTER THAN CHEM. postively sure that i will do better. lol. up next was a.math paper 1. I AM OFFICIALLY SCREWED FOR THAT PAPER. SCREWED, SCREWED, SCREWED. i wouldn't consider that paper difficult. in fact, i would consider it averagely easy. but the problem is that despite having done all the questions that were similar to the exam questions. I HAVE FORGOTTEN HOW TO APPLY THE METHODS. GAHHHHHH!!! (i feel like shooting myself.) hee hee. HOW SUCIDAL. okay on thursday, it was a.math paper 2. THIS IS THE PART WHERE "I HAVE REVIVED FROM THE DEAD". i really enjoyed that paper. SERIOUSLY. it was a good paper. tricky questions but not impossible to do. and i thank whole-heartedly to the examiner who set that paper. THANK YOU FOR LIKE SAVNG MY RESULTS. (: and that person is none other than my a.math teacher. (wide grins) lastly, friday!!! SCIENCE MCQ WAS EASY PEASY. i finished the paper in half the time that was given. and slept through the rest of the time! WHEEE. AND FINALLY THAT'S THE END OF MY EXAMS. (: after school on friday, i went out with chelsea. LOL. watched superhero movie. the plot is seriously dumb. but it was kind of a good stress-relief kind of movie. interesting ideas. LOL. oh and we were at mos burger, snacking on fries. made couple of videos for CVJ Corporations. (i look perv on camera.) LOL. were quite funny. we had a lot of funny conversations especially on food. (food, glorious food. FISHCAKES. :P) OH AND I ALMOST THOUGHT I HAD A STALKER. IT WAS SO FREAKYYYYYYY. >.< umm... yes i know i look fab. but IT WAS STILL SO FREAKY!!! lol. but apparently, we found out that this "stalker" was waiting for his order. so yea. OR THAT'S WHAT I HOPE IT WAS. LOL. went over the chelsea's place to chill. we got bored. so we decided to do THE IMPOSSIBLE QUIZ. lol. and it entertained us for like 1 hour. AMAZING. went home after that. was super tired. had a great bath. (: WHEEE!!! SATURDAY MORNING! went to get hair cut. my hair looks rather different now. but i like it. (: I LOOK FAB AS ALWAYS?! :P hahahahahahaha. that's way to put it, i suppose? LOL. so many dates. yet so little time. to love unconditionally, to care with best interests at heart, to understand every daily need, to put up with everything under the sun, to save our day, to be a great companion, to be a last-minute shopping partner, to be a good family provider. to be a fantastic wife, to be a lady of capability. is none other, than our mothers. BLESSED MOTHER'S DAY! (:
//Thursday, May 08, 2008 10:03 PM
people come, people go. the sun sets, the moon rises. frankly speaking, life's been monotonous lately. everything we do these days would probably be SO DULL. SO HUSHED. SO PASSE. like seriously, with exams, with globalisation, with the basic routinaries, with people suffering from disasters and diseases and outraged violence, with constant efficiency? (how ironic as you might say) nothing much been's happening in much, outside the usual, for my world at least. (perhaps there is definately something interesting in the news of course.) anyway, except for a couple of jokes here and there i suppose. then again, all in all. it only boils down to one thing: THERE'S IS A SERIOUS NEED FOR ADVENTURE. (for me at least) SO MAY SOMEONE PLEASE TAKE THIS WORLD ON AN ESCAPADE? (: despite no matter how far such ingenious imaginations and jokes can take me, MAY WE ALL FALL FROM THE FIRE ESCAPE BACK TO REALITY. IT'S DULL. IT'S HUSHED. IT'S PASSE. well like Shakespeare once said, "A stage, where every man must play a part." well, well, well, i wonder who will be the drama queen on this stage? (:
//Saturday, May 03, 2008 8:46 PM
GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
FINALLY THE FIRST WEEK OF EXAMS ARE OVER! (: i sat for my english and chinese papers on monday and tuesday! AND I THINK I WONT DO WELL FOR MY CHINESE PRELIMS... well compared to my mid-years at least... I COULD BARELY UNDERSTAND 75% OF THE PAPER!!! >.< everything looked like this -----dfjawhfuqeharrgoqh;iikhfoqhLJFHnffgeebugb2u8465? (i'm sure i took the right paper & not arabic or anything like that) OH WELLS THAT'S CHINESE.(: on wednesday i took my e.math paper 1, social studies paper & my chinese listening comprehension! AMAZINGLY CHINESE LISTENING COMPREHENSION WAS THE EASIEST! (now now dont you think i'm weird & kuku?) I LOST LIKE 13 MARKS FOR MY E.MATH PAPER 1!!! EEEKKKSSSS!!! it was out of 80!!! to me that was alot of marks... BUHBYEEEE A1.... (sobs sobs*) AND TO MAKE MY DAY WORSE... I OFFICIALLY DECLARE THAT I WILL FAIL SOCIAL STUDIES! >.< meeps! screwed up the entire paper! i can already predict the outcome for my combined humanities for the rest of the year... (IT'S GONNA BE REALLY BLEAK AND DEFINATELY PITCH BLACK DARKNESS WITH THE SOUND OF CRICKETS CHIRPING) MOVING ON TO FRIDAY! sat for e.math paper 2 & pure literature paper 1 (to kill a mockingbird & unseen)... LETS START WITH LIT... wasn't really prepared for this paper... had to remember alot of things! thank goodness i managed to study the right stuff... while checking the paper for mistakes i took a quick peek at the first essay question! AND I WAS LIKE "OH GOD PLEASE GIVE ME AN ALTERNATIVE QUESTION TO DO!!!" >.< (if you didnt figure, the first essay question was tough.) and thank GOD, HE DID GIVE ME A QUESTION THAT I STUDIED FOR. (: AMEN. i didn't manage to finish unseen... i attempted the poem... it was a nice poem... about RACIAL PREJUDICE. (: IF THE EXAMINER IS MERCIFUL, I WILL PASS. (slim chance though) e.math was alright i think... lost about 14 marks... it's out of a hundred... but i still dont think i'll get my A1... aunty joyce (tutor) said that i didn't do that badly... cause i lost 27 marks in all out of a 180 marks??? BUT STILLLLLLLL... I WANT TO ACE IT SUPER DUPER UBER BADLY!!! oh wells... that was practically my first week of exams... was quite interesting... oh wells! TO ALL THOSE HAVING EXAMS... keep holding on! we're gonna make it through! (: -perhaps i'm just afraid. and not that i don't know how it feels. should i try again? |
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